Kill Your Ego!
The second, which in fact, most riwayat [traditions] indicate is the greatest veil more than the dunya is the veil of 'me', is the veil of my ego and my Nafs, for the Ullama they say, that my biggest sin is 'my own existence'. What did this mean? My biggest sin is my own existence. When I read this, I went and I looked and I found many riwayat of Ahlul Bayt alayhimu as-salam, where this statement is actually taken from.
For they would say the biggest veil between me and Allah, Subhana wa Ta'ala, is me, myself, the ego of the human being, the way in which the human being allows his nafs to be a barrier between him and Allah, because the first who would worship in such a way that we're told there's not even one part of this earth on which that person didn't perform Sajda. Shaytan! There's not one part of this earth that he didn't place his head in sujood.
That person when he becomes deviated, when the veils begin to form between him and Allah when he's told "Fakhruj minha"(38:77), get out from here, "[fa]innaka rajeem" (38:77) you're accursed. What did he say? If you look at the verse, you understand this Ayat he said, "khakahtani min naar' (7:12). Me? I should do sajda, you created me from fire. When a person has this me of his nafs and of his ego and the arrogance of his self, this is the biggest veil between him and Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala and the scholars, they give a very good example.
There's a horse, a person sitting on the horse. They're travelling. Until they get to a water, a stream of water, a river, whatever it may be, very clean, very pure. The horse comes close to it and the horse is stuck looking at its own reflection. The ride of the horse in front of him can see a beautiful forest, beautiful landscape, but the horse is so busy looking at its own reflection, it stops there. So they try to push it. They get off it, they hit it. They try whatever they can to get this horse to move forward. The horse doesn't move forward. There's something much greater in front of the eyes of this horse. There is a beautiful landscape, greenery, stuck looking at its reflection until what happens? Is that one of them comes, he takes some mud or soil, places it into the water so that the water becomes dirty, and then he lifts his head up and sees the beauty that is in front of him. This is the relationship, because he can't see his reflection, when you place mud, the water is dirty. He can't see his reflection. Then he looks in front and moves forward.
Likewise, when I'm stuck with my Nafs and my ego, I don't see the beauty of Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala in front of me. And again, to make this easy for us to understand, I give you an example.
There was an 'Alim ad-Deen, Marja' at-Taqlid who passed away some years ago, Ayatollah Sayyid Abdul-Hadi Shirazi. Sayyid Abdul-Hadi al Shirazi is sitting in his lesson, Bahth al-Kharij , now Bahth al-Kharij, which is where a student learns to become a Mujtahid. Bahth al-Kharij ,often has a lot of debate in that lesson. And you always have one or two students that always wish to speak more, very energetic. They always want to criticize everything that he says.
He's sitting one day, giving his Bahth al-Kharij, his lesson. And there's a student that asks something. So the Sayyid says, 'no, this isn't really right'. So he says no, he gives another answer. But what about this? Telling the Sayyid that 'no what you're saying is wrong'. So the students that narrate this, they say the Sayyid replied with a bit of hesitation that 'no, for example, there's a riwayah here mentioned not with confidence. He said, 'no, actually, there's a riwayah here mentioned, but we'll talk about it later'. That person stopped then criticising. Stop asking questions. And the lesson continued.
At the end of the lesson most of the students left a few, three or four, what were there? And that student comes forward. When that student comes forward, Sayyid Abdulhadi Shirazi says: as for your question, the first answer to your question is this. The second answer to your question? Is this the third answer to the same question? The third proof is this. The fourth proof is this riwayah. The fifth proof is this opinion. He gave so many opinions, 10 or 12 on that one issue that this person is shocked.
So the two or three students that were there said that in the lesson when he asked you this question and you said, 'no, you're wrong'. And he gave that other reply. And what did you say? With hesitance you said, 'actually, there's a riwayah somewhere here. You had all of this knowledge, you didn't express it at that time. Why?' He says because at that time, even though I had all of this knowledge in my heart, I realised that if I reply to him, in the way that I have replied right now, number one, he's not going to be encouraged next time to ask a question. He'll never ask a question again. So I want him to ask questions.
But number two, I was fearful that my Nafs overtakes me and my ego overtakes me. That's why I waited until everyone finishes, everyone leaves. Then I have a Shara'i responsibility to teach him Ahkam, so that's why I told him now. Otherwise I wouldn't have even have said it to him in this case.
The idea is that there are people today who make sure to kill this ego, to kill this Nafs and the self. The greatest barrier between me and God is myself!
Is when I look like that horse at my own reflection at me, rather than seeing Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala in front of me.
Det andet, som faktisk ifølge de fleste riwayat [traditioner] er det største slør mere end dunyaen, er sløret for "mig", mit ego og min Nafs, for Ullama siger, at min største synd er "min egen eksistens". Hvad betød det? Min største synd er min egen eksistens. Da jeg læste dette, gik jeg hen og kiggede og fandt mange riwayat af Ahlul Bayt alayhimu as-salam, hvor dette udsagn faktisk er taget fra.
For de ville sige, at det største slør mellem mig og Allah, Subhana wa Ta'ala, er mig, mig selv, menneskets ego, den måde, hvorpå mennesket tillader sin nafs at være en barriere mellem ham og Allah, fordi den første, der tilbeder på en sådan måde, at vi får at vide, at der ikke er en eneste del af denne jord, hvor denne person ikke har udført Sajda. Shaytan! Der er ikke en eneste del af denne jord, hvor han ikke lagde sit hoved i sujood.
Den person, når han bliver afvigende, når slørene begynder at danne sig mellem ham og Allah, når han får at vide "Fakhruj minha" (38:77), Gå du ned herfra!, "[fa]innaka rajeem" (38:77), Du er bestemt forkastet. Hvad sagde han? Hvis du ser på verset, forstår du denne ayat, han sagde: "khakahtani min naar" (7:12). Mig?
jeg bør gøre sajda, du skabte mig af ild. Når en person har dette mig af sin nafs og af sit ego og arrogance af sit selv, er dette det største slør mellem ham og Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala, og de lærde, de giver et meget godt eksempel.
Der er en hest, og der sidder en person på hesten. De rejser. Indtil de når frem til et vand, en vandstrøm, en flod, hvad det end er, meget rent, meget rent. Hesten kommer tæt på det, og hesten sidder fast og ser på sit eget spejlbillede. Ridehesten foran sig kan se en smuk skov, et smukt landskab, men hesten har så travlt med at kigge på sit eget spejlbillede, at den stopper der. Så de prøver at skubbe den.
De kommer af den, de slår, de skubber den. De prøver alt, hvad de kan, for at få hesten til at bevæge sig fremad. Hesten bevæger sig ikke fremad. Der er noget meget større foran denne hests øjne. Der er et smukt landskab, grønt, der sidder fast og kigger på sit spejlbillede, indtil hvad sker der? Er at en af dem kommer, han tager noget mudder eller jord, lægger det i vandet, så vandet bliver beskidt, og så løfter han hovedet op og ser den skønhed, der er foran ham.
Dette er forholdet, fordi han ikke kan se sit spejlbillede, når du lægger mudder, vandet bliver beskidt. Han kan ikke se sit spejlbillede. Så ser han fremad og bevæger sig fremad.
Ligeledes, når jeg sidder fast med min Nafs og mit ego, ser jeg ikke Allah Subhana wa Ta'alas skønhed foran mig. Og igen, for at gøre dette let for os at forstå, giver jeg jer et eksempel.
Der var en 'Alim ad-Deen, Marja' at-Taqlid, som døde for nogle år siden, Ayatollah Sayyid Abdul-Hadi Shirazi. Sayyid Abdul-Hadi al Shirazi sidder i sin lektion, Bahth al-Kharij , nu Bahth al-Kharij , hvor en elev lærer at blive mujtahid. Bahth al-Kharij ,har ofte en masse debat i den lektion. Og man har altid en eller to studerende, der altid ønsker at tale mere, meget energiske. De ønsker altid at kritisere alt, hvad han siger.
Han sidder en dag og giver sin Bahth al-Kharij, sin lektion. Og der er en elev, der spørger om noget. Så Sayyid siger: "Nej, det er ikke rigtigt". Så han siger nej, han giver et andet svar. Men hvad med dette? At sige til Sayyid, at "nej, det du siger er forkert". Så de studerende, der fortæller dette, de siger, at Sayyid svarede med en smule tøven at 'nej, for eksempel er der en riwayah her nævnt ikke med selvtillid.
Han sagde: "Nej, faktisk er der en riwayah her nævnt, men vi vil tale om det senere". Den person holdt så op med at kritisere. Hold op med at stille spørgsmål. Og lektionen fortsatte.
Ved slutningen af lektionen forlod de fleste af eleverne et par stykker, tre eller fire, hvad var der? Og den studerende kommer frem. Da den studerende kommer frem, siger Sayyid Abdulhadi Shirazi: "Hvad angår dit spørgsmål, er det første svar på dit spørgsmål dette. Det andet svar på dit spørgsmål? Er dette det tredje svar på det samme spørgsmål? Det tredje bevis er dette. Det fjerde bevis er denne riwayah. Det femte bevis er denne udtalelse.
Han gav så mange udtalelser, 10 eller 12 om dette ene spørgsmål, at denne person er chokeret.
Så de to eller tre studerende, der var der, sagde, at i timen, da han stillede dig dette spørgsmål, og du sagde: "Nej, du tager fejl". Og han gav det andet svar. Og hvad sagde du? Med tøven sagde du: "Faktisk er der en riwayah et eller andet sted her. Du havde al denne viden, du udtrykte den ikke på det tidspunkt. Hvorfor?" Han siger, fordi jeg på det tidspunkt, selv om jeg havde al denne viden i mit hjerte, indså, at hvis jeg svarer ham, på den måde, som jeg har svaret lige nu, nummer et, så vil han ikke blive opmuntret næste gang til at stille et spørgsmål.
Han vil aldrig stille et spørgsmål igen. Så jeg vil have ham til at stille spørgsmål.
Men for det andet var jeg bange for, at min Nafs overtager mig, og at mit ego overtager mig. Derfor ventede jeg, indtil alle var færdige, alle gik. Så har jeg et Shara'i-ansvar for at lære ham Ahkam, så derfor fortalte jeg ham det nu. Ellers ville jeg slet ikke have sagt det til ham i dette tilfælde.
Ideen er, at der er mennesker i dag, der sørger for at dræbe egoet, at dræbe Nafs og selvet. Den største barriere mellem mig og Gud er mig selv!
Det er når jeg ser som den hest på mit eget spejlbillede i stedet for at se Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala foran mig.
