Repentance Through An Islamic And Psychological Lense

Repentance is a concept that we cannot discuss without including religious, psychological constructs. The first one we can take a look at, is self-confrontation. This involves recognizing, for example, that sin has been committed, and that repentance is needed, also experiencing sorrow, guilt, or remorse, and confession to God and acknowledgment of that, and perhaps suffering the consequences of having broken that moral law, those can be involved.

The second is self-control, and this requires forsaking the sin and developing a pattern of self-regulation that is incorporated into a new and morally benevolant lifestyle. The third is self-sacrifice, which includes reconciliation, restoring, forgiving, obeying, and serving. And the ways that we handle the emotions involved with that, some people could simply wait until their feelings of guilt have subsided, or they can attempt to convince themselves that what they have done was not really that bad, doing something righteous to balance their account, promising themselves and to God that they will avoid this and they won't do it next time, perhaps punishing themselves and by calling themselves worthless and feeling bad for a day or two, trying not to think about it, and perhaps even avoiding spiritual context, including not going to the Masjid or any religious offense because they feel impure.

Now, another problem that we see with repentance sometimes, is that some people engage in over-repentance. These individuals feel perpetually guilty about things that perhaps weren't their fault or they are very minor. They imagine that they have committed a huge sin when they haven't, or they anticipate that they might sin in the future. This is very similar perhaps to people who experience OCD, obsessive-compulsive disorder, especially when it comes to worrying about things. Similarly, this obsessive preoccupation and depressive self-criticism is not in keeping with the spirit of our religious Text.

Now, from an Islamic psychological model of behavior change of learning, we can see how repentance can take place. In order to do that, we need to explore the Nafs, or the Arabic word used in the Qur'an, about the Self or the soul. We know that the Nafs can be either good or evil as it can be pulled towards higher potentials of the Self or lower potentials of the Self. Due to the different possible states of the Self, many different types of the Nafs are described in the Holy Qur'an.

There's been agreement amongst most scholars that the Qur'an has described at least three main types of the Nafs, ranking from the worst to the better one in quality.

The first one is in Nafs Al-Ammara, the commanding lower Self. The second part of the Nafs is Nafs Al-Lawwama, the self-reproaching Self. Finally, we come to the Nafs Al-Mutma'inna, the peaceful Self, wherein they're all pleased with your blissful destination, well-pleasing to your Lord. We see here the state of the inner peace and the happiness when you feel satisfied and content in yourself. This is the desired state that we are aiming to achieve, In'sha'Allah, the highest level of that spiritual achievement.

Now, in order to achieve this state, one has to activate this remorseful Self. Through sincere repentance, through prayers, supplications, good acts, and deeds that make us feel good, and controlling that lower commanding Self, again, through self-discipline and avoidance of acts that can cause us anxiety or remorse and guilt. And then we can see that the Nafs, in this case, is one entity with these three main parts. Psychological, spiritual conflicts arise when the Nafs Al-Ammara is the dominating part. Therefore, this prevents one from reaching that goal of Nafs Al-Mutma'inna. These conflicts also arise when the Nafs Al-Lawwama is static in the awareness of its guilty actions and not proceeding forward in an attempt to reach that Nafs Al-Mutma'inna.

The point here is that the Self is always in this dynamic flux. The same person could experience different states within themselves at any given time. Western psychological counseling theories and Islamic counseling theories. This is one of the main differences. What we have is we look at the Nafs al-Mutma'inna in its attempt to strengthening its relationship with Allah, Subhana wa Ta'ala, by overcoming the Nafs Al-Ammara.

In essence, it's a journey of the Self to Allah, Subhana wa Ta'ala, that takes place in order to attain that inner peace.

Within this journey, of course, there are choices that we can make to get to where we want. Imam, Ghazali, who was an Islamic philosopher in the 11th century, proposed the six steps towards change. What's interesting to note here is that Mullah Mohsen Fayaz Kashani was known for one of his books, "Burhat Al-Bayda", which he rewrote from the Shi'a point of view of Gazali's "Ihya 'Ulum ad-Din", which is a Revival of the Religious Science. This is where this is taken from. In this model, it talks about a cyclical model of working on the Self, of getting to that point of Mutma'inna. It's almost analogous to a business contract, you could say, with yourself, in terms of trying to overcome something, work through something, and in this case, repentance.

Let's take a look at each of these, and you will see in the diagram here how cyclical it is. Number one, you see a musharata, to make an agreement or a contract. It's a Shart, a stipulation with yourself. This is something that you can do these days, especially during these spiritual nights of Muharram, where you want to work on something specific that you want to change within yourself. Perhaps you want to repent on an act that you have committed or a behavior that you want to eradicate, anything.

So, think right now as we are going through this, think of something, a stipulation that you would like to set for yourself, for these holy days, and something to take on for the rest of the year.

And then you get to the Muraqaba, to guard, which comes from the word Raqaba, which is to guard in Arabic. And so in this step, one must meditate before you take action. And this involves that one must think, contemplate, be introspective, and keep watch over your own Self. We function as our own observer, raqaba.

Then you have al-Muhasaba. This is evaluating yourself. Taking account. Hisab means account in Arabic. This involves the self-examination that one takes, account of their own action and continuously checks if one is upholding that agreement, that initial stipulation of yourself.

And then you have the Ma'aqaba, to punish, to control. And 'aqaba comes from the root word of the Arabic word punish. So if we do not honor our own contract to change, so then we must set some consequences for ourselves for not reaching that stipulation or honouring it.

And then you have Mujahada, coming from the root word of Jaha, effort, to make effort and strive. So in this step, one is fighting against one's own lower Self, the Nafs a-Ammara, and its tendencies and inclination. So this is the stage of continuous and consistent struggle to overcome that Nafs. It's an important step, where the change occurs through Jihad an-Nafs, through the self-struggle.

Finally, you have the Mu'taba to rebuke. Ataba, which comes from the Arabic word repent. So in this step, if one has failed to maintain the contract, we make the effort to turn around, regretting, changing or correcting one's ways of recognizing the error.

And this is where repentance can come in, because it is one's own responsibility here, and choice, to learn from this setback to improve the next contract or do what they need to do.