Let’s talk about: Backbiting

Sub Title:

Let’s Talk about... Series for Children

This booklet with the help of pictures and simple examples aims to teach children what backbiting is, how it affects the people around us and how you can avoid being in a backbiting situation and how we can make a bad situation good.

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Let’s talk about Backbiting

Faults of people before thy;
One who counts and reveals Never keeps thy secret safe nor from others he conceals.

Let us talk about Backbiting.

Backbiting is the same, tale bearing calumniating or parsimony.

Example 1

I will tell Mama!

Whenever you reveal somebody’s secret before another person you are busy in backbiting.
Parsimony sometimes damages others but most of the times make them face difficulty.

Example 2

Mummy! Brother split his milk upon table!

Oh No!

Some people commit backbiting because they wish to draw others attention. They imagine that by backbiting they would succeed in drawing the attention of others towards themselves. But parsimony does not get you the attention of others which you need. Thus you must not commit backbiting to achieve other’s attention.

Example 3

Mummy! Brother has not gathered up his game items!

My brother forgot to gather up his game items. Perhaps, if I inform mother about it, she would attend to me more than the brother!

Some people commit backbiting to show off that they are better than others.
They want to show others as bad ones, so that they themselves appear as nice persons.
Therefore, you must never commit backbiting just to show that you are a good child

Example 4

When I tell mother that my brother has taken liberty with the box of sweets without permission, she would find out that I am not like my brother and do not go for the sweet box. This way perhaps she may think I am better than my brother!

Mama!
Brother has gone for the sweet box!

Some people commit backbiting since they, due to much slackness and laziness, do not solve their problem. And they want that someone else must solve their problems. It is better that you must Endeavour to the possible extent to solve your problems on your own, and do not seek others help.

Example 5

If you do not give it to me I will ask Mummy to force you to give it to me!

Some people commit backbiting to harm others. They wish to create difficulty for others. But you must not do a thing to harm others. Therefore, never at all slander and backbite others just to involve them in difficulty

Example 6

I cannot avoid telling such a thing to Mama, my brother would definitely confront problem.

Persistent and continued backbiting may annoy you Papa and Mama. In such case possibly they may loose their tolerance and temper and get nervous by your conduct.

Example 7

Mama! My brother broke the flower pot.
So much do you speak ill of your brother that I am tired and fed up of it.
If you do not stop this I will punish you.

Similarly he one whom you slander backbite continuously will get annoyed with you and not play together any longer with you

Example 8

Do you want to play together with me?
No, not at all you backbite too much.

Now you know that backbiting harms you and those around you. But this does not mean that you must never tell a thing to anyone.

For example, if somebody’s life is in danger then you must definitely inform others.

Example 9

Mama, my brother sitting in the car, is playing with it.
Very well, I will get him out of the car and thank you as well!

Similarly if someone’s property and wealth is in danger you must inform him.

Example 10

Mama, brother is drawing lines upon the wall.
Very well, I will at once stop him from doing that and thank you as well!

To know it that whether you should tell a thing to others or not you must firstly question yourself
Is this informing for the sake of helping another person?
In this case there is nothing bad.
Does informing aims at harming that person?
In this case do not do it.

Example 11

Oh! Incidentally my breakfast fell down upon the floor!
I don't know whether to inform my mother about it or not.

Before going for backbiting someone ask yourself another question as well:
Have I done everything possible to help out?
Never at all backbite anyone till such time you have done everything possible to help the person concerned

Example 12

Let me clean this place before Mama gets annoyed and you too will not face any difficulty.

It is very important that you must treat others in the same way you wish to be treated by them. If you see someone committing a fault think, ponder and see if you were in his place what kind of treatment would you have desired from others
Try to understand why the person concerned commits that fault. Help that person to get him do what is correct, particularly when he needs help.

Example 13

Let me help you!

You do not like others to backbite you.
This is a good and logic that you also must not backbite others

Example 14

I am much grateful to you for the help extended. From now onwards I too shall try not to backbite you anymore!

Therefore, the best policy would be to consider backbiting legal and fair only when the life and, or, the properties of others be in danger. Or then the object of it be helping another person or supporting him and the safety of the properties of others.

Topic Tags:

- Ethics [5]

Publisher(s):

- Ansariyan Publications - Qum [1]

Source URL: https://www.al-islam.org/lets-talk-about-backbiting

Links
[1] https://www.al-islam.org/organization/ansariyan-publications-qum
[2] https://www.al-islam.org/printpdf/book/export/html/41391
[3] https://www.al-islam.org/printepub/book/export/html/41391
[4] https://www.al-islam.org/printmobi/book/export/html/41391
[5] https://www.al-islam.org/tags/ethics