Wedding

A wedding is a ceremony in which two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnicities, races, religions, denominations, countries, social classes, and sexual orientations. Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of marriage vows by a couple; a presentation of a gift (e.g., an offering, rings, a symbolic item, flowers, money, or a dress); and a public proclamation of marriage by an authority figure or celebrant.

169744

Wedding . Marriage . Safar

Did I make the correct decision by not meeting my non-Muslim friend after her wedding in the month of Safar, considering that she was a newlywed and the month of Safar is considered inauspicious?

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 2 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

There would have been no harm in you congratulating her for her wedding, even though you are in the sacred mourning month of Safar. It is not haram to have done so, as long as you are not intentionally violating the sanctity of the month by engaging in celebrating behaviour, and meeting and congratulating her would not have been such.

And Allah knows best

146600

Parents . Wedding . Engagement . Istikhara

My parents got 4 Istekharas done that came out positive. I then got engaged and now, close to my wedding, my parents got Istekhara done again that has came out negative. What should I do?

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Act upon the first Istekhara. No other Istekhara on the same matter unless there is a change in the matter.

Wassalam.

145002

Women . Wedding . Hijab

Do women need to cover heads in a party or wedding where only women are present?

Bismihi ta'ala

If it is a women only event, and there are no men or baligh males, then you do not need to observe hijab. Of course, in this age, you must make sure if someone is recording, you trust they will not share it in public.

And Allah knows best.

141250

Wedding . Hijab

In many wedding functions we often see that men and women get together and feast together though in a restricted way. Can we attend such functions or should we boycott them altogether?

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 3 years ago

Yes, you can go to mixed weddings, as long as the gatherings are appropriate and decent. You can use your good judgment about what is appropriate and decent.

129704

Family . Wedding . Music

My family want me to have a wedding but they want it to be a mixed wedding with music and dancing. What should I do?

We must refrain from any sinful act even if family and friends insist in it. You must refuse any sinful act. No one is more important to obey more than Allah (SWT). We disobey every one but never disobey Allah (SWT).

Wassalam.

116545

Parents . Wedding . Engagement . Mahram

Can engaged fiancé and fiancée hold hands with the approval of their parents for the purpose of taking wedding related photos?

Seyed Ali Shobayri, Seyed Ali Shobayri is of mixed Iranian and Scottish descent who found the path of the Ahlul Bayt (a) by his own research. He holds a BA in Islamic Studies from Middlesex University through the... Answered 4 years ago

Bismillah,

Asalamu Alaykom,

If they are mahram to each other then holding hands is permitted. So if they are 'engaged' meaning that they have either conducted a temporary or permanent aqd which has been read for them, then it's ok. If neither have been read for them yet, then they aren't allowed to physically touch each other regardless of what the parents say.

May Allah grant you success

106599

Parents . Wedding

What are necessary actions I can take now in order to mend issues with my parents before my wedding?

Bismihi ta'ala

I am sure you know to what extent our religion stresses on obedience and respect to our parents, no matter how old we may be. The necessary actions you must take should in no way wait for your wedding, or be connected with anything else. It should be something immediate and straight away.

Let's say your circumstance is very difficult, like having an abusive parent, or a parent that was never in your life, or other scenarios that unfortunately could occur, it still does not mean you sever your ties with your parent. Maintaining the relationship is very important, and in the worst of cases, doing dua for them is the least you can do.

Always remember the hadiths that say our path to God is through our parents, and we will never enter Heaven if we are disobedient to our parents.

In your spare time, read the hadiths that are on this link:

https://www.erfan.ir/english/28112.html

With prayers for your success.

106218

Parents . Wedding

What should a person do if his parents want to host a lavish wedding night but the groom wants instead to donate the money to the needy?

Bismihi ta'ala

This is a difficult, but unfortunately common situation. As young adults wish to commence their married life, their main focus is stability and building a relationship with their new partner.

Sadly, with some parents of different generations and incorrect mindsets, their focus is more on gaining social status, trying to please those around them, showing off wealth, etc.

Of course, at times parents might think that having a lavish wedding is their method of expressing their happiness and love, but indeed this is the wrong and un-Islamic way of doing so.

Alhamdullilah, the groom is conscious of these things, and his focus is on more important matters. The groom does not need to "donate" the money to the needy. Yes, giving sadaqah is good, but at the same time, this money that the parents want to use to spend of extravagent wedding can be used to invest in their future. For example, as a down-payment for their house, and so on.

I discuss these things in detail on a FB page I have. Please visit it:

https://www.facebook.com/Wedding-the-Halal-Way-1659428630969248/

With prayers for your success.

102720

Parents . Music . Wedding

What should I do if my parents are playing or listening to Haram music if I do not want to upset them or make them sad? And how should I deal with a situation where they decide that they want music at my wedding?

Zoheir Ali Esmail, Shaykh Zoheir Ali Esmail has a Bsc in Accounting and Finance from the LSE in London, and an MA in Islamic Studies from Middlesex University. He studied Arabic at Damascus University and holds a PhD... Answered 4 years ago

Bismillah

Thank you for your question. Enjoining the good and forbidden the evil is dependent on the effectiveness of your actions or words, not on whether the person will feel bad for a time, even if that be your own parents. Rather, what is important is to maintain respect and gentleness if you think your message will reach open ears.

As for playing haram music at your wedding you can state quite clearly that you would be opposed to that.

May you always be successful

92619

Money . Wedding

Is it allowed to throw money in the air at a wedding function?

Wasting money is forbidden in Islam and considered as one of the major sins, but if money is been thrown in the air then collected by children or participants in the wedding as a gift for them to make them happy, it will not be wasting money but gifting it to the children or participants. Gifting money should be within the moderate levels and not over the limits, otherwise if the amounts were over the moderate limits, or just for show, it will be then not permissible. If you know any part of the thrown money will be wasted, then it will be not permissible to waste any money.

Wassalam.

91115

Family . Wedding . Sunni-Shi'a

I am a Shia convert in my family and they are celebrating a wedding on 28th Safar, the death anniversary of RasoolAllah (S). What should I do in this situation?

You have the choice to go to the wedding or to not go to the wedding. It is not required to observe days of mourning for days of wafat or shahadat (death/martyrdom), it is only recommended. Weddings are also optional.

In my view, if you have a good relationship with your family, or if you will regret missing the wedding, then you should go. Allah knows that your intention in your heart is not to disrespect the Prophet (S) and to maintain family ties, and maintaining family ties is also good. The Prophet (S) was compassionate and merciful and would be unlikely to criticise you for this!

However, you also have the choice not to go, and it isn't necessary to go.

This is as long as it doesn't involve disrespect to the religion. Most Muslims don't know that the 28th Safar is the death anniversary of the Prophet (S), and don't commemorate this, so they aren't intentionally being disrespectful when they schedule a wedding. However, for instance, if someone schedules a wedding on Ashura, and they know some Muslims commemorate Ashura, then maybe attending the wedding would convey disrespect to Ashura or give them the idea that you don't take your faith seriously.

The biggest emphasis in our tradition is on avoiding celebrations on Ashura. It is also good to avoid celebrations on other sad days, but the biggest emphasis is on Ashura.

There are a lot of shahadat/wafat days that are commemorated, so, sometimes, in an environment where not everyone shares the same religious traditions, it can be difficult to observe all of them!

87778

Wedding . Divorce . Iddah . Marriage . Sexual

I had my Nikah last year following which my husband and I got intimate before the planned wedding reception. Now we are about to get a divorce before that reception. Do I need to observe Iddah and inform the elders about this situation?

Bismihi ta'ala

Because the marriage was consummated, you would need to observe 'iddah of divorce. As for informing elders, that would be at your discretion.

And Allah knows best.