I have a daughter who will turn 4 in July. As I father I often bathe her, take her to the toilet and she sleeps in bed with me most nights. Until what age am I allowed to do so before I have to step back?

Daughter Father

I have a daughter who will turn 4 in July. As I father I often bathe her, take her to the toilet and she sleeps in bed with me most nights. Until what age am I allowed to do so before I have to step back?

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31281

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	Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the Islamic College in London and also the Managing Editor of the Journal of Shi'a Islamic Studies. 730 Answers	Passed

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 4 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

It is very important for us as parents to teach our children independence and self-reliance as early as possible. It is not only good for the child's personality, building their life skills and self-esteem, but it is also good for the parents as well.

We can see how Islam encourages us to categorise the different stages of growth a child goes through, and to cater to each stage in its correct way.

If your child does not have any physical difficulties that would impede her from doing these things on her own, it is highly encouraged from now to start teaching her these things so she can do them on her own.

The more you delay it, the more difficult it will be for her to learn. Start with toilet training, getting her to learn how to clean herself, on her own. Then gradually give her the confidence that she can shower by herself, and so on.

As for sleeping, I am sure you know how important it is for each child to sleep separately, on their own. Try to read about this topic from the viewpoint expert child psychologists.

With prayers for your success.