Are fathers or brothers ever allowed to be violent towards female family members? Sunni records mention Umar and Abu Bakr using violence against women in their families. Did men of Ahlul Bayt ever react this way when disagreeing with women?
I was watching a video discussing Umar and Abu Bakr's reaction to the tension between Holy Prophet SAW and their daughters (his wives), the scholar discussed the authentic reports of both of them not only beating their daughters, but also literally choking them, to the point of Umme Salma SA having to intervene and berate Umar for interfering in Holy Prophet SAW's family matter. There are alot more instances of both of them being violent towards women, one of Abu Bakr slapping his daughter on the neck while she raised her voice at Holy Prophet SAW, and of Umar slapping his sister on the face before he accepted Islam. Alot of muslims, mainly Umar and Abu Bakr's defenders, defend this behavior, saying since Umar and Abu Bakr were right in these situations, their reactions are justified. Please clarify whether this behavior is justified on behalf of brothers and fathers. Also, for the few Shi'a who also advocate for such violence, did men of Ahlul Bayt also react in such way to women?
Bismihi ta'āla
Nobody is allowed to be violent towards anyone. Violence will not solve anything, especially within a family. A brother has no authority over his sister, so he has no right to discipline or even raise his voice, let alone be violent.
You must read the biography of the Imams (a.s.), to understand their style of raising family members, and how compassionate they were in their method of discipline.
And Allah knows best