Marriage

Bismihi ta'ala

The most important thing a person must do in life is be very cautious about the circle of friends he/she has, and who they associate with. 

We need to be extremely picky and sensitive towards this. 

You need to advice your brother about the direction he is going, and how all this will affect his spirit and religious faith. Try to show him the bad effects of these people he is associating with, and how damaging something like an illegitimate relationship will be, and also alcohol. 

If your advice does not have any effect, try to ask someone he respects to intervene, inform your parents to calmly advice him, and just try your best to dissuade him. Seek advice from people around you as well, who know him.

Dua is also very important. Hopefully, he will come to his conscience and realise the wrong direction he is heading. Just never give up.

With prayers for your success. 

Bismihi ta'ala

The fundamental issue here that must always be observed is "family involvement".

Make sure that parents of both sides are aware, fully involved, and give consent.

The only and best way of honour the opposite is by honouring his/her parents and family members. 

If parents give consent, and they are happy with this suitor, then yes, you should meet with each other. Meeting in public could be a good idea, as long as you both know that it will not bring about any problems from small-minded people who might want to gossip and accuse. 

Hopefully, by having a meeting, you will both be able to decide about marriage, and get married. 

With prayers for your success. 

Bismihi ta'ala

The statement "emotionally unstable" is very broad, and so it could be difficult to say whether it needs to be disclosed prior to a marriage proposal or not. 

If she has a chronic illness that would affect her spousal relationship, and impede in what people would see to be a healthy marriage, then it is best for her to be upfront about everything so she is not left with a broken heart or an early divorce. 

In general, it is always better to be direct and clear about one's mental state of being, and to mention what would be for or against them. 

Everyone is entitled to get married, even if they have certain challenges they are facing, and of course she can get married if she is emotionally unstable, but honesty is always going to work to everyone's advantage. 

Hopefully, with therapy and support of her family and loved ones she can overcome these emotional difficulties, and maybe marriage will secure her mental stability, in shaa Allah.

With prayers for your success. 

Bismihi ta'ala

In my opinion, yes, I do think it would be a valid reason to reject a marriage proposal. Ultimately, what we aspire to achieve in marriage is living together and forming a family. 

Circumstances could arise during a marriage where a spouse must be away for a period of time, in which case consent from both sides is necessary. But if stay away from each other for long periods of time can be avoided, then that would be the best and healthiest thing to do. 

If it is unavoidable, and will be for years, and they cannot travel together, nor see each other, then a decision must be made that would be equally fair for both. Getting married and then immediately leaving your wife/husband for a few years is not an ideal situation to be in, and if it can be avoided, then that is best for both. 

With prayers for your success. 

Bismihi ta'ala

We have addressed this issue a few times, discussing coerced marriage being Islamically invalid and the worst kind of oppression. 

The nikah would not be valid, because you are not willingly getting married. 

Please see the other answers given on this topic of forced-marriage. 

With prayers for your success.