Parents

A parent is a caregiver of the offspring in their own species. In humans, a parent is the caretaker of a child (where "child" refers to offspring, not necessarily age). A biological parent is a person whose gamete resulted in a child, a male through the sperm, and a female through the ovum.

151044

Parents . Husband . Domestic violence

I involved my parents due to my husband's verbal abuse, where he belittles me, calls me lazy, mocks me, and insists he comes before them. Is it right for him to demand this priority despite his abusive behavior?

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 3 months ago

It is better to keep your issues with your husband between you and him with out involving others as much as possible. If you both are completely unable to sort your things together then a person from your family with a person from his family can be involved to sort things out. Don't try to make your parents take a negative opinion about your husband by hearing your side of the story before hearing his side. Involving your parents should repair and strengthen the relation between you and your husband and never to create enmity or bad feeling between them and your husband. You and your husband should talk peacefully to understand the reasons of your misunderstands and to try to avoid it as much as possible.

Wassalam.

204892

Girl . Parents . Respect . Marriage

I am a 21-year-old Muslim girl living with my parents. They don't respect my boundaries, and I cannot live with them anymore. Is it okay to ask them to arrange a marriage for me to move out?

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 4 months ago

Women have looked to marriage to escape difficult family situations for ages, and it is natural to want to get married at your age.

If you choose that route, be sure that the person you marry is a good choice (as much as you can tell) so that you go into a better situation, not a worse situation.

Sometimes girls tend towards marrying someone like their father, because he is a familiar model of manhood, and if he has some difficult traits, be sure those are not found in your future husband.

Also, my personal advice is, do not tell your future husband that you married him to leave home, because that can make you seem vulnerable or might make him feel unwanted. Rather, just focus on building a life together and the positive aspects of being together.

If you can move away for university, study abroad, work, or other opportunities, that may also be an option. Financial independence can give you security and let you marry by choice rather than necessity.

In any case, it is good to have some idea what your expected future direction might be - for instance, does your family expect you to marry, do they expect you to work, do they expect you to stay home and keep doing the same thing, etc. It sound like there might not have been much guidance or discussion in this area.

Girl . Parents . Respect . Marriage

I am a 21-year-old Muslim girl living with my parents. They don't respect my boundaries, and I cannot live with them anymore. Is it okay to ask them to arrange a marriage for me to move out?

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 4 months ago

Bismihi ta'āla

I would not advice you to get married only for the sake of wanting to leave the house. If you do this, you might compromise your requirements for who you will marry, and your judgment will be wrong, and end up in a situation far worse than staying at home with your parents.

And Allah knows best

204613

Brother . Parents . Phone . Sin . Privacy

Is it sinful for me to check my brother’s phone to see what he and my sisters are saying about me and my parents in a group chat, considering they are gossiping negatively about us?

Bismihi ta'āla

In this case, it is sinful. If they are all gossiping about you, try to understand why, and seek advice regarding the issues they are raising, to see if they genuinely have a point, and if you should try to look at their perspective. As for spying and violating someone else's privacy, this is haram.

And Allah knows best

204180

Parents . Wedding . Marriage . Children . Disownment

If a man is good in Deen and character, is it permissible for me to marry him if my parents oppose for cultural reasons, threaten to disown me after wedding, and make Duʿa that my marriage fails and my children turn out corrupt?

As a virgin Muslim girl, you need your father's or your paternal grand father's approval for your marriage. If your father's refusal is based on un Islamic reasons, then you might try convincing him through your relatives of family friends who can talk to him. You should always keep the respect for your parents and never utter a word which can harm their feelings.
In case your father insists on rejecting for un Islamic reasons, you can refer to you Marje' of Taqleed and seek his advice or verdict after explaining your situation.

Wassalam.

202305

Marriage . Parents

Is it true that Allah will ruin my marriage if my parents are not happy with it, even if the man is religiously suitable?

Virgin girl needs the permission of her father or her paternal grand father in her marriage.

Non virgin woman does not need her parents' permission in her marriage. Man also does not need permission in his marriage.

If your parents are not happy with your marriage for religious grounds like the person is non Muslim or non believer or non religious etc, you should avoid such marriage. If their disapproval is based on cultural or ethnic or economic reason which are not valid in Islam, you will not be harmed as far as you follow the teachings of the Prophet (SAWA) and Ahlul Bayt (AS).

Wassalam.

201041

Girl . Parents . Family . Sunni-Shi'a . Marriage

I am a 32-year-old Sunni-born woman who has practiced Shia Islam for six years. My parents insist I marry a Sunni, but I wish to marry within the Shia community. Their resistance is growing stronger each day. What should I do in this situation?

No one has the right to force you to marry whom they want against your wish. This is the Islamic rule in all Islamic Sunni and Shia sects.Forced marriage us invalid. It is your life and you have the full right to choose your husband who should be a suitable Muslim man who follows Ahlul Bayt (AS) like you.

You may try to convince your parents either directly with very polite way, or indirectly through persons who can convince them. You should never give up and put your life with a person who is not suitable for you or a person who might create obstacles in your way to Allah, the Prophet (SAWA) and Ahlul Bayt (AS).

Wassalam.

202308

Parents . Marriage . Sin

Is it sinful if my parents physically hurt me or insult me over my choice in marriage?

It is obviously sinful for any one to physically hurt or insult other person over his or her choice in marriage. If your choice in marriage was not against Islamic rules, no one is allowed to object or insult you. Your parents want you to be safe and happy, and you need to understand the reasons behind their stand against your choice. You should never disrespect your parents nor reply them back. If you are sure that they are been misinformed about your choice, you should clarify the facts for them.

You need to always be very polite with your parents and keep on praying for them.

Wassalam.

202329

Consent . Mut'a (Temporary marriage) . Parents

If a temporary marriage contract is to facilitate verbal communication only, can it be done without parental consent or would this situation fall under a different ruling due to the circumstances?

Bismihi ta'āla

For the validity of the contract, for whatever reason it may be, the parent must give consent. It is also definitely the ethical thing to do.

And Allah knows best

200864

Parents . Akhlaq

Is it permissible to feel resentment towards one's parents if their reckless behavior is causing constant frustration?

Although it's more difficult to control feelings than to control actions, it's good to try to let go of resentment as much as possible since it only poisons you and does not help anything. It is better to focus on anything practical you can do that is best for the situation (if there is anything), and if there isn't anything you can do, try to focus on other things.

Sometimes as we make our way through life, we get a better understanding of the psychological reasons why parents act in a less than ideal way and can have compassion for that, even if their choices were harmful to themselves, ourselves, or others.

Parents . Akhlaq

Is it permissible to feel resentment towards one's parents if their reckless behavior is causing constant frustration?

Showing or any type of expressing resentment to your parent behaviours is not allowed. Saying Uff أُفٍ which is a word of resentment is not allowed to your parents no matter what they do.

Wassalam.

201004

Parents . Family . Marriage . Sunni-Shi'a

Is it Islamic for my parents to prevent me from marrying a Lebanese Shia man from a respectable and religious family just because of his nationality, despite our compatibility and my desire to make our existing relationship Halal?

Islam discourages racism and tribalism and encourages accepting any suitor who is mu'min and compatible. However people are complicated, especially when it comes to their expectations for their children's marriage and potential future descendants. I am sorry you have to go through that.